


Best Bot Dum-E: Bedtime Enthusiast

by rebelmeg



Series: Rebelmeg's Tony Stark Bingo Fills 2019 [13]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Bot fic, Dum-E Appreciation Hebdomad, Dum-E is the best bot, Fluff and Humor, Gen, MIT bros
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-21
Updated: 2019-03-21
Packaged: 2019-11-26 21:30:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,070
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18185966
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rebelmeg/pseuds/rebelmeg
Summary: Dum-e is a very good helper bot.  Steve witnesses him being helpful in an unexpected way.  Tony will probably have a few small bruises...





	Best Bot Dum-E: Bedtime Enthusiast

**Author's Note:**

> Here, have some silly bot fluff! This is made for both the Tony Stark Bingo (Square T1 - humor) and for the Dum-E Appreciation Hebdomad!
> 
> [LadyMaya](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyMaya) was my wonderful beta!

Living in the Avengers Tower, Steve was used to all kinds of noises that would be considered out of the ordinary in other homes. Living amongst superheroes was just like that. 

The ding of the elevator arriving on the communal floor didn’t phase him. The sound of movement in the hall, where most of his fellow Avengers usually kept a jacket or a pair of shoes, didn’t make him glance up.

However, the sound of a body being dragged across a floor was enough to bring Steve out of the book he was reading (Treasure Island, a childhood favorite), and look down the hall.

Rolling along on silent wheels, Dum-E came slowly into view, and as he rolled past, it became clear that his claw was tightly gripping the back of Tony’s shirt, dragging the limp man down the hall.

Steve was halfway out of his seat in a panic, worried that Tony was hurt, when Colonel Rhodes came walking down the adjacent hall, a book in his hand from the library that took up a quarter of the floor. Rhodey didn’t even blink as he walked past, patted Dum-E’s strut, and stepped right over Tony’s body before continuing over to the sectional in the communal living room to join Steve.

“Hey, Cap. How you doing?”

“Um… is… what?”

Rhodey looked confused for a moment, then followed Steve’s feeble gesturing. “Oh, Dum-E? He’s just putting Tony to bed.”

That explained almost nothing. “It’s… daytime? On the communal floor?”

Rhodey was just grinning. “What makes you think Tony adheres to any kind of sleeping schedule, Cap? And he’s got stickers in the elevator so Dum-E and U can tell which floors they’re okay to go to, but they mix ‘em up sometimes.

“He’s just… dragging Tony on the floor.” 

“Tony has been dragged on worst things. Trust me. I was there with him in the 90’s.” A thoughtful look crossed his face. “Hey, JARVIS?”

“At your service, Colonel.”

“Why didn’t Dum-E just put him on the couch in the lab? Wasn’t he down there?”

“Yes, but Agent Barton is already sleeping on the couch, Colonel.”

Rhodey started laughing. “He went down there to test out a new bow six hours ago and just decided to kip out on the couch?”

“It certainly seems so.”

Still laughing, Rhodey sat up and peered over the back of the sectional when he heard a thump in the hall. “Dum-E, you need a hand, buddy?”

A series of beeps came from down the hall.

JARVIS translated. “He says he’s got it handled.”

Chuckling to himself, Rhodey settled back against the couch. Steve’s eyes were still about popping out of his head, and he looked torn between staying where he was and running after Dum-E.

“So, that kind of thing… happens… often?”

Rhodey just snorted with amusement. “It happens so often that Tony is able to fake sleeping while he’s literally being dragged down a hallway. What do you think?”

Steve looked shocked. “He isn’t really asleep?!”

“Could you sleep through that? Nah, as long as he’s not drunk, he always wakes up when he’s being manhandled. Wasn’t always the case though. Early on, Dum-E used to be able to haul him anywhere and Tony would be none the wiser. He thought it was me putting him to bed for a while there.”

“You guys were roommates in college, right?”

“Yep. Two above average, underage punks causing trouble.”

Steve smiled, a thread of nostalgia winding through him. “Sounds like me and Bucky.”

Rhodey nodded as the elevator dinged again. “Probably. You and Bucky ever light a full bathtub of water on fire, and been subsequently sprayed by a bot with a fire extinguisher?”

“You what?!”

Pepper came into view on her sky-high heels, her work briefcase in one hand.

“Are we talking about Tony shenanigans?”

“More like Dum-E and Tony shenanigans. All the times Dum-E has carted Tony off to bed, regardless of whether or not Tony stayed asleep.”

Pepper smiled as she sat down. “Sounds like a Wednesday.”

The sound of a door closing down the other hallway preceded the appearance of Dum-E again, rolling along and bobbing his arm in what looked like a cheerful way. He didn’t stop and linger, but he did slow down and go right by the couch to get petted by everyone before he headed back to the elevator.

“So… Tony’s not really asleep?” Steve asked.

Rhodey held up a finger as the elevator arrived. “Give it a second.”

Once the elevator doors closed after the bot, Rhodey and Pepper both turned their heads to look down the other hall. A moment later, the library door opened, and Tony stepped out, looking thoroughly rumpled.

Rhodey started sniggering as Pepper grinned and Steve looked bewildered.

“That is the last time I let that dumb bot haul me out of my lab and into whatever room he finds with an unoccupied, upholstered flat surface.”

“You say that every time.” Pepper tried to say around a giggle.

“I mean it this time.”

“You say that every time too.”

Tony glared at his best friend and rubbed at the top of his head. “He banged me into the doorway again.”

This time, Steve couldn’t help but laugh too, and even Tony was smiling, if a little reluctantly.

“I get no sympathy from you awful people.”

“Hey, it means he cares, right? Would you rather have a bot that didn’t care?”

“I’d rather have a bot that didn’t assume me closing my eyes for five minutes meant I needed to be grabbed by the scruff of my neck like a kitten and literally dragged off to bed.” Tony muttered, but it was clear to see he wasn’t actually upset. If anything, he sounded rather fond.

“You know, if you stop pretending you’re asleep, he’d stop." Rhodey put in, sounding like he'd made that point more than once.

Tony scowled, but it was half-hearted. “I don’t go around telling little kids Santa doesn’t exist. I’m not about to let my tragic, idiot metal child think he’s not helping.”

And didn’t that just say everything a person needed to know about Tony Stark?

Steve shook his head and smiled as he got back to his book, listening to Tony brewing a pot of coffee, Pepper kicking her shoes off, and Rhodey flipping through the pages in his book.

Never a dull moment in the Avengers Tower.


End file.
